I Guess It Depends Who You Are

like really. there are some ppl right, when they do well or get something good, somehow, even if you know you shouldn't feel that way, you will feel envious of them. envious of their success. envious of their blessings they receive.

it's like u will somehow in ur mind ask, why couldn't that be me. and this will sometimes happen even with best friends. it's weird isn't it. i know most of us won't want to feel that way among our friends. like it's just not right to envy ur friends who do well and think "oh why couldn't that be me." i mean, as friends we should be happy for them right? not jealous of them.

but i guess u can't blame urself. it's natural human behaviour i guess?

but there's something i realize, there's certain ppl, no matter how well they do, i won't be jealous of them. it's like i'll automatically be happy for them. i can think "wow! they did well! that's really awesome!" it's like a genuine feeling of happiness for them. like ure so happy ur friend did well for something or got something.

aih. dunno if i'm making sense la. anyway, i jus tot to myself, why do i feel like so happy when a normal feeling would be jealousy. the only answer i could come up with is because the person itself is just that awesome person. in the way they live their life, their attitude, the way they treat u, the way they treat others etc. basically cuz the person is jus awesome.

so i guess it just depends on the type of person u are la. like there's someone i know who did a tag and got over 20 comments for it. it shows that this person is awesome right for like so many comments to happen?

yea. i guess my mission is to become like that sorta person la. someone awesome as how i see them.

gahh. dunno if i'm making sense la. but ya. jus thoughts in my head.