Monday, September 29, 2008



the new CMSA website is like.. ZOMGWTFBBQ awesomeness!

Mamat is the man la. seriously.

cekapness la. haha.

check it out! --->

Currently Listening To: House Of Wolves - My Chemical Romance

Now That I Think Of It...

i really think it's like one of those movie things la.

how it happened in real life i also dunno.

i doubt it happens in real life la. ish.

i'm refering to the even that happened earlier today when i walked into a tiang .

cuz i wasn't paying attention. k la it was cuz of a girl i guess. ish.

stuff like this only happens in movies laaa... how come can happen to me. ish.

then got some random guy on the bus laughing at me somemore. too much. ish.

ok u all can stop laughing now too. double ish.

my life is apparently a comedy movie la. nonsense betul. ish

Currently Listening To: April Sixth - Dear Angel

I Don't Have To

cuz i really don't have to.

cuz i'm tired of making everyone happy.

doing things i don't wanna do.

seeking approval in their eyes in doing things i don't want to do.

things in fact i don't HAVE to do.

just so tired of all this.

so yea.

i find comfort knowing i don't HAVE to.


Why should I
Have to try
To fix things i didn't create or contrive?

Currently Listening To: The Night - Goodnight Nurse

Sunday, September 28, 2008

I Wonder

i wonder if there'll ever be a day when if you didn't like something someone did, you could and would actually go up to the person and tell them that instead of just keeping it in ur heart and hoping the person will find out somehow.


Currently Watching: Fringe Episode 1 Season 1

I Want My Games Back

this sucks! :(

after i uninstal got ppl playing COD4 quite often.


but i know it's for my own good. but i wanna play. they played for an hour plus that day too! :(

now i'm so tempted to install COD4 again. haih. shud i? hmm.

and my stupid CD burner screwed up in burning my CD. so the last two songs can't play prop.


but walking back after futsal jus now listening to the songs i've burnt was happyfying. :)

and Shooter is a damn good movie. like really. k maybe cuz i like COD4 la. haha.

k better bathe and study and do online quiz and math assignment and laundry. k bye!

Currently Listening To: Breaking - Anberlin

Saturday, September 27, 2008

One Small Step For Me

one giant step to becoming and getting what i want.

i don't see it as a loss.

cuz i've seen and noticed the things noone has noticed.

and i believe i know better.

i'm just protecting myself from suffering.

and stepping closer to my goal i want to achieve. :)

regret? definitely not. :)

and i can predict what's gonna happen.

so must learn where to step away from the line of fire.

and smile and walk away. :)

Currently Listening To: Casting Crowns - Stained Glass Masquerade

Do You Feel

currently listening to the Do You Feel album by The Rocket Summer (which apparently a one man band), and for some reason, with every song i listen to, i just feel like switching to the song Do You Feel.

i guess it's just that time when i'm addicted to a song again. haha. but seriously, the song is really that good. i liked the video too. and the song has a real good meaning as well. combined with the video = epic win. so yea.

get the song. :)

I'm thinking 'bout other things I heard about today
All this week and tomorrow
And how these hands could create some better things for bettering
but you see for now I got my own things
I can't help it
I got too many issues I own
So I cannot help I'm afraid, yeah
But keep on preaching, preaching can heal the world
Lip service makes us look great

Do you feel
The weight of the world singing sorrow
Or to you is it just not real
'Cause you got your things?
Yeah we all have our things I guess

I guess my mind wanders off
from time to time
Sometimes I convince myself
that all is fine in the world
It's not mine
Why should I
have to try
to fix things I didn't create or contrive

Do you feel
The weight of the world singing sorrow
Or to you is it just not real
'Cause you got your own things
Yeah we all have so many things

Have the habits
Had you
Has it been for long
Can you feel the souls behind what's going on

Do you feel
The weight of the world singing sorrow
Or to you is it just not real
'Cause you got your own things
Yeah all have our things

Do you feel
The weight of the world singing sorrow
Or to you is it just not real
'Cause you got your things
'Cause we all have so many things
And I can't get past these things


Currently Listening To: Hold It Up - The Rocket Summer

Nuffnang Ads

k i must say, nuffnang ads jus PISS ME OFF.


cuz they seriously SLOW down the loading of the page by A LOT.

when i'm on broadband sure it's fine. but then on diap up... pfffftt. have to wait so long b4 the rest of the page can load.

seriously pissing off.

so ya.

random smth i had to say. haha.

Currently Listening To: Ammunition - Switchfoot

Friday, September 26, 2008

Song Suggestion For CD 5

k la. i really dunno what songs to put di for my CD 5. nvr planned for the CD la. but yea. currently liking the bunch of songs u see there la. i think i need abt 1 or 2 songs more.

so if u got anything u think i may like based on my songs that u see. feel free to suggest smth and i'll take it into consideration. thx. (i really wonder if i'll get any replies from this request. haha.)

and so far, the best CD's i've burnt is still CD 1 a.k.a Disc One and CD 3 a.k.a Rocking Disc. such great CD's. i have a feeling this one will be good too. i think the skill is in not rushing to make a CD. jus slowly along the way make one. haha. and so far right, the odd number CD's are the cekap ones. haha! so CD 5 shud be good.


Currently Listening To: There's No 'I' In Team - Taking Back Sunday

Don't Place A Bet On Something You'll Lose

cuz that's pretty much placing a bet with me la.

cuz i don't bet unless i can win.

which i guess is pretty much not a fair chance to you since i already know i'm right and i'm gonna win.

so yea. when i insist on something and am willing to bet on something, it pretty much means i'm gonna win.

so just don't bother la. finding the time to prove you right is really a waste of my time.

don't be stubborn and accept:

Ben = right.


Currently Listening To: Take This To Heart - Mayday Parade

Thursday, September 25, 2008


so cool

it even has live cut scenes. for the first time. not the half animated ones.

so so cool.

can't wait.

Currently Listening To: Rough Landing Holly - Yellowcard

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

The Number 23

damn good show.

definitely a must watch.

go. watch. i give you leave to do so.


Currently Listening To: 23 - Jimmy Eat World

I Look Like Someone

you know right, i was looking at the pic we took during CS's bday.

and right, i think i look like Howie D like how he looked like in the call video.

the only pic i cud find. go watch the video to see properly

hahaha. what u think? got resemblance? =P hahahhaa

funnily enough i actually sang his part when we performed in form 2. haha!

Currently Listening To: The Call - Backstreet Boys

Cuz Hardly Anyone Says So

cuz honestly, noone has ever said that to me.

and yeah, i have myself to blame with the way i let ppl see myself.

and considering i was trying hard to get it, when i finally got it, man, it was so fulfilling. :)

and i know it was honest and sincere opinions.

cuz the ppl who said it don't know me that well to know what i wanted or should hear.

aaahhh. it was jus happyfying la k.

now i can prob die happy. :)




Currently Listening To: Can You Keep A Secret? - The Cab

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

If You Wanted A Song Written About You All You Had To Do Was Ask

i like these lyrics. esp the way it's sung.

take me home
i'd rather die than be with you
take me home
you have a problem with the truth
take me home
because this happens every time
and i knew it would...
i knew it would...

Mayday Parade

No i'm not emo. haha. just listening to some emo songs that sound nice. haha.

Currently Listening To: So What - P!nk

Yes I Know Thx

yes. i know i don't fit in.

and i know i never will.

i've known since the start.

i'm dealing with it. and i must say pretty well considering i stick out like a sore thumb.

so don't rub it in and try to make things worse. even if it is unintentionally.

i'm not a kid. though i can act like one, i know the right things to do and not to do.

i suggest you realise that too. and don't act like a kid either and don't treat me like one too.


for making me feel out of place even more.

Currently Listening To: Prepare The Masses - A Change Of Pace

Monday, September 22, 2008

7 Months Later

16th Feb 08

22nd Sept 08

what a diff. haha.

and Happy Birthday Choon Seng! :)

Currently Listening To: Burn This City - Cartel

Sunday, September 21, 2008

The Lappy Is Now Gamefree! (Almost)

yeap. those are the only two games left on my laptop now. everything is UNINSTALLED. totally gone. the only reason i have Warcraft is cuz it has nvr worked by other ppl installing. so now that it works i can't uninstall cuz then i dunno if the complicated process of installing can be done again. and the TF2 is still there cuz i haven't played a proper game yet so i stilll wanna try.

yeah. everything is gone. i never expected myself to do this as well. haha. and why i did this? cuz my results have been sucking bad. so i'm gonna try and change and study more and do well. no games means no distraction. so shud be good. i hope.

and i was going through my pictures of when i left Malaysia. and i think of all the pics i took with everyone, this is seriously the best pic of all.

dunno why la. but somehow this pic i like the best. i think cuz like Rachel said we both have like the same parting. so our hair looks quite the same. quite cool la. like matching liddat. plus i think my hair looks the best here. this photo makes it look like it's the best length la. plus i think i look gaya la. but that's as usual so nvm la. haha.

aaannnddd while looking through the photos, i realised i dun really have any proper photos with some of the ppl i'm close to like Jo (the only photo i have of you is when u were gonna leave for US in Form 3 i think. and that also i don't have with me now. rubbish la.), Caleb, Dana, & Lauren. seriously no photo with jus these ppl alone. what rubbish la. ish. now i think of the airport thing and get pissed off again. too much la airport. ish.

and for a person who loves photos, my life i feel doesn't have enough photos (like stated in the previous paragraph). plus i don't even have a proper camera. rubbish la.

and i'm hungry now too.

ish. i'm whining too much. ishhhh


kk MU vs Chelsea! gtg

Currently Listening To: Home - Daughtry

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Popular Pun Problem

"Hey Benji! Yeah you probably don't know me but i know you"

like wth?? how does he know me la. sheesh. k i blame it on the fact that my neighbours here at connon are like the popular kids la. so by some weird default, somehow ppl know me. and not only they know me, they know my name also. weird giler. it's like u have a few ppl u say hi to but u have NO IDEA what their names are, but somehow they know urs. i don't like this state of unknowing.

and that quote up there ^ is said by some guy, whom i've NEVER seen before. random giler. k i must have done something la. the problem is i have no idea what that caused them to know me for no reason. weird giler.

k yeah, uni is a bit weird.

and k 6 naked guys just ran down my hall. =_="

sif i needed to see that b4 i sleep. ish.

and yus!!! i finaly found my Sound The Alarm album that i wanted!

and i finally washed my jacket!

and Tun's Bday was cool. expensive fancy dinner. but still cool. haha. and some 19 yo act like real small kids it's unbelievable. shocking too.

and being friend's with both ur friend and ur friend's girlfriend is cool. cuz it always tends to be u know ur friend and dun really know the gf so u can't really talk with the gf most of the time. but that's most prob cuz i was in a guy's school la. so i know the guy mostly and not the girl. but yea. it's less awkward which is nice.

k sleepy time.

Currently Listening To: Closer - Sound The Alarm

So Many Views

in 1 day and 2 hours, i got 183 views and 30 downloads. :)

it is quite happyfying that something that is so simple is actually viewed by so many ppl and downloaded so much in such a short time.

it wud probably be more if i gave it a higher resolution and remove the trademark. but i'm already happy giler. haha.

all it needed was the small idea and wish. haha.

happy! :D

Currently Listening To: Breathing - Yellowcard

Friday, September 19, 2008


1 week and 4 minutes later:
Springy! :D

but it's still feeling cold some days. :(

but still! at least the flowers are here. hahaha.

Currently Listening To: Stop This Song (Love Sick Melody) - Paramore

Music Influences Part 3

so, since i've got nth to do, (yeah right. i got emails to reply. but not really in the mood la. k la. maybe after this. haha.) decided to continue where i left off here.

The Rocket Summer - Do You Feel

this band definitely goes under feel good and happy songs category. i mean. k la most their songs. it's like a happy feeling about it. dunno la. very nice to listen. i feel like smiling la. happy songs basically la. k i'm talking in circles now. anyway, i remember that Julian intro-ed this band to me like online. cuz he was like addicted to the band at one point of time. so he was spreading his addiction. which turned out good for me la. cuz now i can enjoy their music. haha. got like a few songs then i decided to get their whole album since Break It Out and So Much Love from the album sounded good.
First Song Heard: So Much Love

Simple Plan - Still Not Getting Any...

k this band as i recall was from my elder sister who said their first video from their first album was funny and i should watch it when i can. i think i also heard them on the radio first. i have this album cuz of my youger sis who went and bought this CD. who knows la why she bought at that time. but anyway, i listened to the CD and i think it's actually a really good CD la. the songs are all pretty good and nice to listen to.
First Song Heard: I'm Just A Kid [No Pads, No Helmets... Just Balls]

Sound The Alarm - Sound The Alarm EP

k this band i totally found on my own. haha. i was like listening to music online then i was like hmm. k let's try and listen to this song from this band. and i was oooo not bad. cool. so i got the song la. then got this album. which is just ok ok only la. cept that one song i like. trying to look for the new album of thiers. but can't find ANYWHERE. :( haih.
First Song Heard: Suffocating

Sugarcult - Lights Out

heh. this band first heard of them from Beccy Choy. cuz she was trying to find the lyrics to one of their songs on her (now non-existant) blog. so i also go cari la. then i got the song and got a few other song and i liked them la. so then this album came out so why not la get it. it's not bad la. nothing great i guess. but a ok listen.
First Song Heard: Memory [Palm Trees and Power Lines]

Sum 41 - Chuck, Underclass Hero

k this band i think i saw thier video on MTV la one day. and yeah it was a catchy song. so went off to get it. then when Chuck came out it was like their emo emo style music. and it was like quite cool la. plus i grew a liking for them already la. then went for Youth Camp, i remember Peter telling me to get the Chuck album. so yeah i finally got it. it's pretty good la. emo and all. Underclass Hero is like totally diff from that. it's more fun fun jumpy rock songs. more political and all that. more than Chuck la. but UH was like all the songs sounded similar. didn't really like that la. but some songs were still not bad la.
First Song Heard: Hell Song [Does This Look Infected?]

Switchfoot - The Legend Of Chin, New Way To Be Human, Learning To Breathe, The Beautiful Letdown, Nothing Is Sound, Oh! Gravity.

heh. this band. dunno what to say la. they're pretty much like awesome la. their concert also was the bomb. sooooo cool. and soooooooooooooooooooooo worth it! :D haha! their songs are ... hayoo all are nice la. relaxing in some way. and their guitar stuff is cool too. prob one reason why i like them. haha. anyway, i believe this band was another MTV found band. i think i saw them on MTV then only i realised the existence of the band. haha. i think if i had to choose a best album it'll have to be between The Beautiful Letdown or Nothing Is Sound. quite hard to choose between the two.
First Song Heard: Meant To Live [The Beautiful Letdown]

Taking Back Sunday - Tell All Your Friends, Where You Want To Be, Louder Now, Louder Now: Part Two

comes to one of the most power bands ever. haha. k i like had them on my comp since like forever but never bothered to listen to them. and the song's i had at that time also was put on my comp thx to Sara Anne. so she intro-ed the band to me. haha. and then one faithful day when i was emoing, i listen to one of their songs and all the lyrics made sense and could be applied to my life at the time. and i jus fell in love with them. their best album is still Louder Now i reckon. the Part 2 of Louder Now was also a good listen. cuz it shows how awesome they are live. haha.
First Song Heard: Cute Without The 'E' (Cut From The Team) [Tell All Your Friends]

Yellowcard - Lights and Sounds, Ocean Avenue, Paper Walls

this band rocks. just like their website url says they do. haha. this band was found by watching MTV again. i was like wow. their song rocks. like really. plus they have a violinist also. how cool is that?? haha. their guitars also sound cool in their songs la. so even more i like. the video also cool. so how la not to like. i think one of their cool videos which is a must watch is Rough Landing Holly. and their best album i think is... erm hard to choose la. all albums got pros and cons. all are good la actually. haha. get them all! :D
First Song Heard: Ocean Avenue [Ocean Avenue]

oKKAAAIII. so i'm finally done. k not really. cuz i know i like downloaded at least 5 albums that are before the letter R. but yeah. kinda malas to do di. but i wanted to finish this cuz at least i got some way of remembering how i know these bands. haha.

finish! :D

Currently Listening To: Ammunition - Switchfoot

Thursday, September 18, 2008


all that late night playing as practice.

was so worth it.


p.s.: i think my msn pic is quite cool la. not cuz i'm trying to be perasan la. but actually cuz i took the photo and it came out quite nice as a DP. haha.

Currently Listening To: Here We Go Again - Paramore

Liquid Nitrogen!

so yea. we were innocently sitting in the physics lab doing our lab.

SUDDENLY! the ground starts smoking like those rock concerts where u see smoke coming from the ground.

why u ask? if u read the title then u shud know di la. haha! anyway, my supervisor for the lab had thrown liquid nitrogen on the ground which evaporated so fast that it looked like smoke la.

so ya. half the lab was like playing with the liquid nitrogen and doing crazy stuffs. watch the vids la. lazy to talk so much. haha.

liquid nitrogen(LN) on hand

LN Orange

Hitting the Frozen LN Orange

The orange was then thrown out the window and it broke like glass into pieces. Unfortunately no footage could be provided cuz everyone was crowding around the window. :(

moving on!

Touching LN

LN Eraser

as u see in the video, jus as my friend was abt to throw in on the ground, the thing exploded in his hand and into a few pieces. must be the heat from his hand la. haha. u can't really see, but it's as hard as rock. later it went back to it's rubberyness. haha.


LN Snickers! :D

it was ok la. not that great taste. i burnt my fingers trying to take a piece cuz i touched some LN. yea it burns ur skin. but still all good.

oh and in the room next to mine, they froze a banana. and then they used it as a hammer. cuz it was so hard. and they hit a nail into a piece of wood. until the banana broke. haha!

AND! cuz of playing with it. i didn't manage to finish my lab report. :( ish.

but it was still fun la. haha!

Currently Listening To: Baby Come On - Elemeno P

The Plan

i like the plan.

i really like the plan. it's like perfect.

yea it's evil and mean. i know that.

but i still like it.

and that's prob cuz it's evil and mean. thats why i like it.

it's like i'll be relieved of everything after the plan.

go plan go!

Currently Listening To: Life Of A Salesman - Yellowcard

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Today Was Gaming Day


all i did was game.


from like after lunch all the way til dinner.

then after dinner continue til 9 smth.

why? cuz i wanted to finally finish my Assassin's Creed. and yeah. jus like Crysis, there's gonna be an Assassin's Creed 2.

and i am so relieved the game's over. wasn't very comfortable with the storyline and the things said. but it's all jus fiction. so yea la.

and then! at 12 smth i find out SOMEBODY *coughJonSEcough* had to purposely keep trying and trying and trying to beat my speed. til he finally got it. and i cannot lose face all, played for like 1 and a half hours to finally manage to match his score.

NOW i can sleep. soo tired di racing so much with so many diff cars. ish.

too much la u Jon. too much! hahahahah

Currently Listening To: Into The Night - Santana (ft Chad Kroeger)

Tuesday, September 16, 2008



i don't think we should just agree that something done is great or awesome or nice just because it's our friend who did something.

the only reason to give such approval should be because you truly feel that way about the something done.

sorry, but i won't say something you did is nice or great or awesome unless i really feel that way.

and i don't think it's my problem if you have a problem handling the truth.


(soon to be up! : Playing with liquid nitrogen! >=D)

Currently Listening To: Hunting For Witches - Bloc Party

Monday, September 15, 2008

Which Game Needs To Go?

k i'm constantly running out of space. that i've resorted to deleting some of my movies and some series di.

why? cuz i can't bear to delete my games.

sayang k. and i like variety. and who knows when i might want to multiplayer one day right? so some games can't delete also. Team Fortress 2 is a new install so def can't la.

left with only 20GB left. too much. i so need an external la.

the only good part is that i did justice to my gaming laptop. haha!

Currently Listening To: Snow (Hey Oh) - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Sunday, September 14, 2008

This Is What You Call Skill

Drawn in pencil:


busy. studying. gona die. bye

Currently Listening To: Sure Thing Falling - Yellowcard

Tuesday, September 09, 2008


cilaka. i just realised i didn't play any games today. since when i became so busy la?

oh ya. when i procrastinated. ish. too much!

and i'm thinking of getting Ocean Avenue album from Yellowcard now. pretty good album la. haha.

Currently Listening To: Empty Apartment - Yellowcard

This Is Why I Love The Show

seriously la. One Tree Hill is like one of the best shows EVER! k la somehow it's a bit corny la. so maybe not the best show ever. but seriously, not bad la the twists and turns. sudd out of nowhere the unexpected happens.

but too much la. 2 episodes of the latest season have an extremely pissing off ending. DAMN TOO MUCH MAN. damn tulan. hayooooooooooo. first one i was pissed off like crazy. then this one is like awww too much. depressing rubbish.


but still a damn good show la. haha.

Currently Listening To: Tears Don't Fall - Bullet For My Valentine

Monday, September 08, 2008

Talk About Pentium 1

too much la. my brain was running on pentium 1 just now. i read the thing at like 9 something? and now it's 2 smth only i realise. ftw la. and seriously la, every year it's like it grows worse. the words grow even more of a lie. pffft. a lie i believed thinkin it was true.

i guess this is the 2nd part of the cannot tahan series.

fuck that lie la.

got a problem don't read.


Currently Listening To: XO - Fall Out Boy

I Don't Care

don't you just love this song? i somehow love the lyrics to the chorus. it's so Fall Out Boy-ish. and also damn cool la. haha.

I don't care what you think
As long as it's about me
The best of us can find happiness in misery
Currently Listening To: I Don't Care - Fall Out Boy