Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Maybe I Should Start Deleting Some Games Huh?

after all i can't play all at the same time right?

but i do at least play 7 of those regularly. sort of. hmmm. i think Generals should go first. then Rainbow 6. and i think i'll stop there. lol.

k back to work!

Currently Listening To: New Born - Muse

Monday, September 28, 2009

Well Now You Know I Wasn't Joking

it's kinda funny. for me atleast.

you took what i said, and made it a joke. why? cuz it seemed to good to be true. cuz i was just being arrogant and talking big.

to sum it up, you looked down on me cuz it seemed like i was only talking big.

and now when the time came, i showed you i wasn't all talk. now you're irritated. maybe ashamed too.

and i feel awesome. :) cuz it's fun proving you wrong. actually no. it's fun proving me right. :) actually, it's fun both ways la. haha.

i already have many reasons not to like you. but i'm better than that. :)

Currently Listening To: The Webs We Weave - Escape The Fate

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Bitch Time

k the whole lucky draw issue is what i wanna talk abt. sry for those who won't understand. and honestly, the whole discussion deviated greatly from the original point. it's quite amazing actually. anyway..

k first of all i wanna start out saying the fact that she commented AFTER everything is done is really irritating. and out of this whole issue, this is the one thing that pissed me off. why? cuz it relates to Cyber Games.

k for those who don't know what happened, the ori CG was supposed to be DotA (cuz a lot of ppl said they wanted to play that). then sudd those a lot of ppl disappeared. and then in the midst of that, when some ppl heard that we couldn't get enough ppl for the CG, they said that "oh if it was CS we sure will join la". so fine, we changed it to CS, and guess what?? NOONE SAID THEY WANNA JOIN NOW. noone replied the emails or the texts. (k only one person did. but what happen to all those ppl who talked so much saying they sure join?). i mean seriously, no way ALL can be busy right? so yeah, it's easy for ppl to talk after the thing is organised and comment on things saying oh it should have been done like this. when we change to cater to you, sudd no response. what crap?

so yeah. this is why this issue bugs me la. i mean it's so easy to sit and comment. but when ppl put you up to the challenge, you don't wanna take. reason? i'd rather be an observer? what stupid rubbish is that. then like this u'll just sit and forever try to find faults and complain la. it's way easier to do that anyway rather than try to change the problem. that's the problem with most ppl also. like in our country i'm sure there's a lot of ppl who can sit there and complain and complain and complain abt the country. but who is actually doing something to change it?? i mean seriously, sitting back with a stupid excuse "i'd rather be an observer" ISN'T gonna change ANYTHING. if you wanna talk, better be ready to freaking walk ok.

If you talk you better walk you better back your shit up

London Beckoned Songs Written About Money By Machines
Panic! At The Disco

then the next part, thinkin you wont cause and hurt or disappointment in the organisers? really? with all the arguing ure doing based on ur BIG EGO and ur failure to just let this thing go? and forget about it? after all, by saying and constantly arguing it also gives the impression that you think we are being inconsiderate and insensitive to let the dance go on? this could lead to a whole point altogether. i mean really, how much do we have to give in to your views? it's not YOUR night. it's for everyone. back to not meaning to hurt anyone. let's put it like this la k. what if someone comes up to you and says "daymn ure ugly" they meant no intention of hurting you. just telling the truth. now what? i believe everyone would know how hurt u'd feel right?

and how much do you follow your words? saying that the women shouldn't dance and sing in front of guys means that you SHOULD NOT support any women who do right? so there goes all the women singers in Malaysia who are muslims la. i mean, you shouldn't listen to them right, unless ure a hypocrite. so what now, listen to guys? what if the guys turn the girls on? so then no listening to guys as well? so no music from any muslims right? can you follow what you're preaching?

and then you complained and said 'whoa don't get all emotional when writing the comments'. like hello, as if you weren't all emotional in your first few comments. what with the excess of question marks and exclamation marks. classic example of pot calling the kettle black la.

and honestly, the way you talk clearly and the things you said was saying that whoever disagrees with you is wrong. yet you still can say you are not acting like that? you clearly have the "holier than thou" complex. your ego will prevent you from seeing it.

funny thing is, you said that it's okay if you lose friends for fighting for the whole issue. you assume you can survive alone. 500 bucks says you cant. so stop trying to act so tough.

honeslty, i've known you for 4 years now. i know you're the type of person who like to comment on ppl. you always sit back and comment on the things they do wrong or if whatever they do doesn't agree with you. when oh when will you ever try and make the change? sitting back and talking is damn easy ok. and stupid fool can do it.

pssshh. k i think i'm done la. k no that's a lie. that's actually more stuff that i can talk about. but considering, it's 3am, i can't form proper sentences to explain myself (like in this whole post), and i can't remember what else, i'm just gonna leave it here.

feels good to lepaskan. now it won't be on my mind.

Currently Listening To: Hammerhead - The Offspring

When You Become A Sell Out

nobody remembers you cuz they hate you.

for real. i mean seriously who knows that Avril has a whole new album out this year?

i didn't even hear of such a thing. and it's a good thing too. after her disaster of her previous cheerleader album, probably nobody wants to hear her anymore.

well i guess that's what happens when you go from punk to cheerleader. you lose whatever respect ppl had for you.


on a happier note, Mayday Parade's album is out! :D listening to it now.

Currently Listening To: If You Can't Live Withouy Me, Why Aren't You Dead Yet? - Mayday Parade

Thursday, September 24, 2009

I Think I Shall Bitch About This

but maybe tmrw. as for tonight. i'll sleep.

and darn, why'd it have to be taken down? =(

p.s.: Black Ice + ulcer = DAMN CRAZY FREAKING PAIN OKAY

Currently Listening To: Slow Dance With A Stranger - Danger Radio

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I Refuse To React On Knowing Through FB

i honestly don't like doing things on FB based on what other are talking about for everyone on FB.

what the hell am i talking abt?

it's basically like this, if it's someone i'm hardly close to, just cuz i'm notified by the facebook events section that it's their bday or even if i see someone wishing them, does not mean i'll wish them.

i mean, i feel it's really insincere don't you think? the only reason i would be wishing is cuz someone told me, not that i actually care about the person or that the person actually did tell me before. not cuz i just found out based on someone wishing that person.

cuz seriously, if there wasn't FB, then i wouldn't know abt the person's bday. and if i din know, i clearly don't know that person that well and i haven't taken the effort to find out.

so yeah. and it's basically not bdays only. like anything happening in the other person's life. if i find out they're leaving for some other country through their chat with someone else, i see no reason to wish them bye if i'm not close to them. i mean, first they did not tell me personally, so we both acknowledge that we're not close to each other. and 2ndly, saying bye and i'll miss you when i don't mean it is just pure dumb.

pssshhh once again jumbled unorganised thoughts. but yeah if you get me, you're awesome. and the only time i reach to what ppl have been talking abt, is only when i care about them enough that i feel i should know about them. other than that, i refuse to react based on finding out something thru ppls chats. just because it's insincere.

Currently Listening To: Majestic - Majestic Youth

So According To What I Said

well apparently since i've gotten what i wanted, it's time to change isn't it?

i should. it wouldn't be fair if i didn't.

but it feels like under the deformation i've been through, i've gone past my yield strength from elastic to plastic deformation.

or so i think. maybe i just wanna stay plastic.

well, we'll just see what i decide.

This city's killing me
I want, I want, I want everything
This city's killing me
In the heat of Los Angeles
What has become of me?
I want, I want, I want everything

Currently Listening To: Los Angeles - Sugarcult

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Yes This Is Why I Like COD4

i still got it in me. and this is like 3 months++ not playing. plus it's on a new comp so it's a whole diff feeling.

yes this is why i like the game. :) i like being good at something. :)

25-30 Kill streak. can't remember the exact number

unfortunately, i was using the sniper after dying the first 2 times. plus i wasted a lot of bullets missing the target. gotta improve.

aahhh how i love COD4. :)

Currently Watching: House Season 6 Episode 1 & 2

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Use Somebody

listening to the original version, the paramore version and remembering last night's ball version, this is the conclusion:


which means..

Evlyn, Mervyn and Adrian TOTALLY PWNED Paramore at the song. totally. and some of you know how much i like Paramore. i've two CDs on my wall ok. so u know i'm not being biased. Paramore just sounded like they ruined the song. but Ev just made it sound so awesome. like really.

i'm still in disbelief how ppl can actually say the Paramore version is good. what crap.



(though you'll probably never see this. :P)

hmmm i hope somebody recorded it.

Currently Listening To: Use Somebody - Kings Of Leon


i hate waking up early on mornings.

esp after late nights.

now the inclination to change this has fueled other supposed dying thoughts in my head.

oh and last night may not have been perfect, but it was good enough plus i'm too lazy to care di. so whatever i got, i'm happy with. :)

Currently Listening To: Ignorance - Paramore

Friday, September 18, 2009

Friday No Drink

this probably the first friday where i had smth to drink and didn't drink it.

prob i should celebrate by drinking. hahahaha :P

Currently Listening To: Whatever You Like - T.I.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Lesson 101

~Hiding something from people

-give them no reason to ask or suspect anything

~Making people curious

-give them a reason to ask or suspect something
-be a failure at hiding something

Currently Listening To: Headfirst Slide Into Coopestown on a Bad Bet - Fall Out Boy

Wednesday, September 16, 2009


k ignore the title. but this is funny for those of you who watch CSI: Miami


on a more emo note, test today sucked so bad. i dunno why i panicked for. so i din have enough time to do. what crap. plus 211 design task this time sounds like a lot of work. crap.

on a happy note! my Lab Report got amazingly high! i dunno how also. i mean when doing the discussion, i simply wrote and it wasn't like so much explanation also compared to other ppl. and i din even do the error propogation. plus the song 10,000 Nights is getting really addictive. i can't wait for the ball on Sat. it feels like it's gonna be fun. So seriously, YOU GUYS SHOULD GO FOR THE UCSSS BALL. :)

i feel happy now. cuz i managed to finish online quiz, finish test, finish memorizing chords, finished learning the solos. i feel like i accomplished a lot but it's not really a lot. haha. now the Cyber Games poster is sorta half done too. i hope there's enough ppl this time tho.

Currently Listening To: Rock & Roll - Eric Hutchinson

Remembering Sunday

He woke up from dreaming and put on his shoes
Starting making his way past 2 in the morning
He hasn't been sober for days

Leaning now into the breeze
Remembering Sunday, he falls to his knees
They had breakfast together
But two eggs don't last
Like the feeling of what he needs

Now this place is familiar to him
She pulled on his hand with a devilish grin
She led him upstairs, she led him upstairs
Left him dying to get in

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm gonna ask her to marry me

Even though she doesn't believe in love,
He's determined to call her bluff
Who could deny these butterflies?
They're filling his gut

Waking the neighbors, unfamiliar faces
He pleads though he tries
But he's only denied
Now he's dying to get inside

Forgive me, I'm trying to find
My calling, I'm calling at night
I don't mean to be a bother,
But have you seen this girl?
She's been running through my dreams
And it's driving me crazy, it seems
I'm gonna ask her to marry me

The neighbors said she moved away
Funny how it rained all day
I didn't think much of it then
But it's starting to all make sense
Oh, I can see now that all of these clouds
Are following me in my desperate endeavor
To find my whoever, whoever she may be

[Juliet Simms:]
I'm not coming back, I've done something so terrible
I'm terrified to speak, but you'd expect that from me
I'm mixed up, I'll be blunt; now the rain is just
Washing you out of my hair
and out of my mind
Keeping an eye on the world,
So many thousands of feet off the ground, I'm over you now
I'm at home in the clouds, towering over your head

[Alex Gaskarth:]
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home now
I guess I'll go home

All Time Low

Currently Listening To: Luckie St. - Cartel

Monday, September 14, 2009

Facebook Is My News Page

seriously. it's the only place i get my news.

well even if i don't get the news there, if ppl say something interesting enough, i end up googling to find out.

and just for the record, yes, that is how i found out abt Michael Jackson.

sad. i should read the news more. :P

Currently Listening To: Say It Again - Marie Digby

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Crap I Think Everyone Knows

malunye. like hilang muka di. :(

Currently Listening To: Remembering Sunday - All Time Low

Saturday, September 12, 2009

I Think I May Have Overpacked Myself

somehow maybe i've got too many things going on at once.

in CMSA committee. Refuel band. UCSSS band. sunday church service band.

on top of that there's homeworks and assignments to do.

this week will be pretty bad. UCSSS band have to memorise all their song chords and stuff for the ball this sat. and practice is whole of friday. and sat.

on top of that. there's a 224 test on wednesday worth 20% of final grade. and a 227 quiz on friday. not to mention onine homeworks for 227 on sunday, monday and thursday.

Design task 3 is out on wednesday as well.

gotta plan for the next Cyber Games too for the sat after the ball. hopefully can go talk to the place ppl tmrw and see how it goes.

i think i may have overpacked myself with stuff.

and with my self set standard and pride, things probably get worse as i expect myself to do extremely well.


Currently Listening To: Unnatural Selection - Muse

Tuesday, September 08, 2009

Malaysia Negaraku

Currently Listening To: Didn't See That Coming - Taking Back Sunday

How Objective Can You Be?

when you act or feel something, can you be objective?

for example. you don't like something someone does, but then realise that you are the one doing it or have done it b4.

do you continue to get irritated by what the person did? or realise ure not any better and you shouldn't be complaining or you deserve it? do you still think that you have reasons for doing what you did while the other person has no excuse?

why do you get immunity?

it's ok to feel guilt or shame knowing what you don't like was what you have done/are doing.

it's NOT okay for you to be angry or upset.


no idea why i used you here. it feels like i'm refering to somebody. funnily enough, i'm not. i guess i'm refering to you reader. so yeah. you.

Currently Listening To: You Know How I Do - Taking Back Sunday

Monday, September 07, 2009

I'm Freaking Out. Great

how am i supposed to concentrate like this??

most prob cuz i've nvr done such a thing b4.

well i asked for it, now i got it.

crap. i'm nervous as.

like for real. i just stoned and zoned out staring at the screen thinking abt.

it's exhilarating yet nerve wrecking at the same time.

kk. don't think much of it. it's nothing. you will be fine. breathe in breathe out.

and i realised i have no idea how i'm going to lie abt it.

i tend to sneak a smirk when i lie about sneaking stuff.

and now i'm staring at the email i got. freaking out.

and i realise i'm typing the same thing over again. blame the freaking out la k.


Currently Listening To: Come Home - OneRepublic

Saturday, September 05, 2009

Albums Left Worth Buying

k so the ones on top are the ones left to buy. the others since my other post have finally been bought after hard searching. and i saw a Deluxe Version of Switchfoot's The Best Yet. now i so wish i waited (hmm). plus a Deluxe version of Where You Want To Be. dunno whether to buy or not. expensive. almost bought it that day out of impulse.

crap la. i spend A LOT when i'm pissed off.

75 bucks right there. crap.

and Kim! i've got the baileys! now what?? haha.

Currently Listening To: Which To Bury, Us or The Hatchet - Relient K


i'm still pissed off.

fuck you guys la.

wasted my money.

i guess i have myself to blame too for being nice.

fuck la.

i wish i had more guts and know how and bravery and not niceness to handle this situation.

argh! >:(

Currently Listening To: Hot N Cold - Katy Perry

Thursday, September 03, 2009

Note-To-Self: Pictures

take as many photos with all my friends as i can.

so that in a few years time we can look at them and look at how much we've changed and laugh.

well i think it'll be pretty cool. :)

which reminds me, i think my batch ppl shud take a picture again like last year. sitting in the same position. and if we do it every year, we can watch how much we grow year by year! :D

Currently Listening To: Untitled/Trapped - Paul Dateh


if you don't care abt something someone is explaining to you, do you just tell them you don't care or pretend to care?

one choice, you be sort of rude (cuz hey ppl want you to care cuz they care. how that works i dunno). and the other choice, you be fake and you suffer listening to smth you don't wanna listen to.


somehow just find a way to care.


Currently Listening To: Slow Dance With A Stranger - Danger Radio

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

Well It's That Time Again

What we have in life is based upon moment to moment choices of what we do in each of those moments we choose.We either take a risk, move toward what we want or play it safe & choose comfort, most of the people most of the time choose comfort. In the end people either have excuse or experience reason or result buts or brilliance.They either have what they wanted or they have a detailed list of all the reasons why not.

This quote, speaks to me. and in more ways than one.


I know i shouldn't let it affect me. guess i'm not fully over it as i should be. i don't wanna care. i don't i don't i don't. it's so irritating how it always appears there. and i'm reminded. well, for now at least. by tmrw it'll all be gone, mostly at least. then i won't be forced to think abt it.

sucks to know i mattered. and now i don't.


ran across some quotes i put up in the closed down blog. pretty awesome stuff. love those quotes.
feel free to get some awesome quotes here.


i need real ppl. not ppl who agree with you all the time. i don't want to be soft. it'll be painful yeah i know, but that's what i want. i gotta force myself to take it. life isn't a perfect place.


if you congratulate and encourage ppl for the smallest good things that they do, doesn't that mean you kinda look down on them as being a low self esteem person who isn't capable of doing smth big? cuz if u lift them up for the small things, then they end up thinking that's all they're capable of so they don't achieve higher.



i think my arrogance is getting out of hand. it's that or ppl just like proving me wrong. they seem to go out of their way to do so. hmmm.


and that is exactly why i don't give my opinion. cause nobody likes to hear smth that they don't agree.

how lame.

Currently Listening To: What To Say - MoZella