Why Am I Worrying About The Money?

k my mom is like "Go for the ski trip. nvm that it's expensive. these once in a while things must try"

and then she was also like "So after we visit you, you come back with us la"

and i'm like "What the. Money doesn't grow on trees la ok!"

haha. so weird right? normally it's the other way around. but yeah. dunno la. my parents want me to go back with them at the end of the year all. but pppssshhhh. no way la. what crap 4k to come back. so many reasons to come back. but got reasons to not come back as well. mostly people i don't intend on seeing ever again and also the hot weather.

but anyway. ya. i think mostly cause i don't wanna spend my money. cuz right now, since coming to NZ, i'm surviving on my own money a.k.a JPA la. eh actually ah, my ticket back home last year also i paid myself. plus the camera i bought also is my own money.

yeah, so i guess i know my parents want me to come back means that i'll be spending their money. which i seriously hate doing i guess.

why? i think i figured it out. it's cause i absolutely hate asking people for help. seriously. in anything i do. i prefer doing it myself. why? i just don't like bothering people i guess. i mean, they sure got better things to do. plus if i can do it myself, i'll do it. plus i don't like asking for help from people who don't really wanna help right? so yeah. if they offer fine. if not, i'd rather not. i think sometimes if they offer also i prefer not to.

another reason i like staying in NZ. i feel so independent. it's like how it'll be when i'm working. so it's like a glimpse of my independent future. pretty cool. what'll be cooler if i can survive 4 years here without relying on my parents. then i guess for the future i should be okay. i hope at least. haha.

so maybe that's why i'm kinda protective about money. cuz it's mine that i'm using and not my parents. they've got tons to worry about already. i don't need them adding me to their list thank you very much. haha.




BUT right, all this talk about going home at the end of the year makes me wonder........ hmmmmm......

Currently Listening To: Carousel - Linkin Park