Not Just Yet

ok. prob most of u wondering why this blog has gone private. well, basically the reason is some extreme kay-poh-ness by certain parties led me to this. i still dunno y he did a search on my blog for certain ppl. is it to find out whether i have been talking bad abt them so he can rat me out so he can feel great? plus if i did speak badly abt anyone wudnt it cuz i have a good reason to do so. i dun simply say things without havin thought abt it a lot.

n most of the time when i say stuff i end up right.

anyway, lots of stuff has been happening. really. like some ppl have said, i have all the clues, i jus din put them all together. n now i see the picture clearly. i feel kinda dumb la. knowing that i shud have seen it but i didnt. oh well, this is my training to be more observant i guess. hmm.

i'm still pondering abt that other thing. do i really wanna stay there? can it really be changed? bvut its not a changeable thing. its what makes you. but with you there are 2 sides. n i like the side of you that doesnt appear much. so i guess this is the best solution. since things really will nvr ever change. and it is a sad solution for me. knowing that i tried but it was nvr good enough.

which is better? having fun n enjoying urself now n regretting later in life? or waiting and keeping everything so that when u finally get to enjoy u will experience a great happiness which u can bring til ur life's end?

i guess its jus like that malay proverb

Berrakit-rakit ke hulu, Berenang-renang ke tepian,bersakit-sakit dahulu,
bersenang-senang kemudian

think abt it and choose wisely. jus so u dun regret.


Currently Listening To: Faint - Linkin Park